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You know when you're feeling a bit down
about yourself and where you're headed, it affects just
about everything.
The simplest thing can trigger off a depressohead
episode - a late bill payment, a comment about how good
someone is doing with their life, a TV show featuring
beautiful and successful women...it seems silly for anyone
to be depressed over someone else's good fortune or fictional
characters. But other's good luck seems to highlight our
own perceived incompetence. We just want to get ahead
too, dammit!
The fashion industry, sports car salespeople
and beachfront apartment real estate agents know this
only too well.
The term mid-life crisis usually applies
to men in their 40's who suddenly want to be 20 again,
so they buy the sports car, the loud shirts and get the
hair weave. On a serious note, they question their place
in the world. The movie American Beauty dealt with this
issue (in a twisted way!).
I think this 'crisis' happens to all of
us...okay, maybe not the hair weave bit, but who hasn't
questioned whether they're cut out for life on this planet?
Everyone else seems to be happy and successful except
for us!
You complain to your best friend how bad
your life is over a nice wine and dinner dressed in your
snappy clothes...then the guilts kick in when you see
somebody in a wheelchair or think about starving children
and what a schmuck you are for complaining about your
life when compared to these people.
Gets awfully complicated, doesn't it.
There's an old joke which goes: "I
always wanted to be a somebody in my life but I should
have been more specific." We're pressured to be a
somebody or a something, and when things don't go according
to plan (this imaginary plan), the downers start.
It's like a success envy.
Maybe your relationship sucks and you're
hanging onto this guy because your goal is to be married
and, well, he's there. You hate your job, but it's a job
and you do need a career after all.
They are fine goals, but who ever said you
have to stick to just one? And who ever said you need
to cling on to what you've got now to be happy? Who said
you cannot change things if you're not happy? Who said
you have to be happy all the time anyway? Who said you
have to have designer clothes and the latest hairstyle
to be anything in this life? It helps for a short time,
but it ain't a long term solution. You gotta feel good
on the inside - without Dolce and Gabbana.
You are allowed to feel down sometimes. It helps put things
into perspective. You are allowed to think your job sucks.
But if it's your inner thoughts that are spoiling what
is a good job or relationship, then perhaps you're looking
too far outside yourself for a solution to your life.
The solution is found right inside your
head.
You can keep changing the goalposts whenever you want.
If your dream career turns out to be a nightmare, find
another dream. There are plenty to go around!
If you have to make one firm goal, be it
not to take life or yourself so seriously. Life is a journey,
not a destination, and we all take different routes.
You are allowed to have fun along the way!
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