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Bill's
Sister
Dear
msX ~
It's not fair. I know everything isn't fair in life
but there is no way out. All Bill does is correct and bug me to point where I get so mad that all I can do is take
defense. So, I hit. I know I shouldn't but, in the past I told him to stop and he hasn't and I don't know what
to do because it is all that gets his attention. How else can I get his attention? My dad is so important to me
and he hit me, told me not to hit my brother and said that it got my attention. It was like the first time he has
ever done this so, it really surprised me. So, later in the day I hit my brother because he would make fun of me
and corrected me about saying clis instead of chris on accident and stuff like that. It drives me insane because
he is younger than me and he tells my mom everything on me and she gets mad. That is understandable but she will
never listen to me. I tell her that it annoys me that he corrects and makes fun of me but she just tells me that
she doesn't care and that it is no reason to hit and that I shouldn't hit. I understand that I shouldn't hit but,
what do you think? What should I do? I told my mom and now she is going to get mad at my dad and I don't want her
to.
msX says~
Hitting isn't right no matter who dishes it out. Sit down and have a family conference where everyone gets their
own five minutes to talk without interruption, including your brother. Everyone else has to shut up and listen
until it's their turn. You, too. Then make some family rules, one of which is, hitting is never permitted.
ms. X
??
Dear
msX ~
Me and my b/f didn't really have intercourse, but I
don't think his penis touched me down there. It did get close though and I need to know if there is a chance I
could get pregnant?
msX says~
A kind of too close for comfort call. If you're going to go that far, you need birth control and protection. Be
smart.
ms. X
Party
Dear
msX ~
My teenager held a party at my home while the rest of
the family was away. She was supposed to be staying with a friend. Things were stolen, Damage was done (minor)
a number of kids slept over apparently. What would be the appropriate consequence for this situation? Obviously
we are quite shocked and disappointed.
msX says~
Make her name names and call their parents. Explain what happened. While they may not offer to make good on the
damages, your daughter will be properly mortified and the message will go forth that you are not parents to screw
around with. Make her pay her share, too.
ms. X
Wanting My Best Friend
Dear
msX ~
I have been friends with this girl Actually she has
been my best friend for six years through high school we have celebrated all our birthdays together I have flirted
with her some times but she is beautiful I couldn’t help it well any way my problem is that she is going into the
Army in a month. running away from life I guess. Her birthday just passed and we got a little drunk and we kissed
touched each other a little but that was it. We have talked about this and we have both come to the conclusion
that we want to go all the way, and tonight just happens to be the night. I don’t know what to do now I am very
nervous I don’t want to ruin the friendship but I really want her now and she wants me. Should I risk it all on
a one night fling, or is it ok because we both talked about it before. I would really like to know if I am making
a big mistake.
msX says~
Best friends make the best lovers. But, your night is over by now. I hope you followed your instincts.
ms. X
I’m a little nervous
Dear
msX ~
You see I don't usually go out on dates. I’m going on
a double date with my friend and the guys she is with and his friend tomorrow and I’m extremely nervous. I might
his friend once and no I’m afraid that I’m not going to be myself or make myself look stupid or something. He's
also older than me so it's a little intimidating! What should I do, I’m thinking about not going, should I go or
not?
msX says~
Relax, how are you going to gain experience if you don't practice. Look at this as a dress rehearsal and try to
have fun. Stop worrying, it is only one short moment in your life.
ms. X
FRIEND DELEMA
Dear
msX ~
ABOUT 2 YEARS AGO I MADE A NEW FRIEND SHE HAS ALWAYS
BEEN NICE TO ME AND SEEMS REALLY GREAT NOW BEFORE I MET HER SHE HAD A FRIEND WHO SHE HAS KNOWN SINCE 4TH GRADE
WE DID NOT GET ALONG IN THE FIRST PLACE. BUT NOW SHE IS SHOWING SHE HATES ME AND IS TELLING ME THAT MY GOOD FRIEND
DOES NOT LIKE ME EATER WHAT SHOULD I DO???
msX says~
I'd ignore her. Branch out and make new friends. Let your real friend speak for herself.
ms. X
air sickness
Dear
msX ~
Which is the best way to not fear air sickness and not
to vomit?
msX says~
I have no answer for you. People use all sorts of techniques to relax when flying, from tranquilizers, to visualizations,
to reading a good book. Post the question on one of the boards and maybe you'll get some fresh advice.
ms. X
Love?
Dear
msX ~
I am a junior in HS and he is a freshman is college.
I have been dating him for 10 months...and he is totally in love w/ me.. BUT I don't know if I am w/ him. We've
talked about it and he still tells me he loves me and I don't know if I do or not? He is the most sweetest and
caring guy you'll EVER meet! I luv him to death! My family thinks he's great. He's the guy I would want to marry.
but I am in HS and want to date around and I love flirting! Lately we've gotten really close, like almost having
intercourse and I don't know if I want to or not. He knows I wanna wait and he told me he wants too but he doesn't
act like it. And his penis got awfully close to me and I don't know if there is a chance of me getting pregnant.
Is there if we didn't have intercourse?
msX says~
Don't take any chances without being protected? You are one thrust away from having intercourse, don't fool yourself.
You're not done with high school, he's got plans for college, I’m not saying don't have sex, but please don't have
an "oooops moment" and leave yourself unprotected. If you have these feelings about not wanting to be
tied down yet, trust them, and maybe think about putting off intimacy. There's no crime in wanting to shop around
before you make your final selection.
ms. X
don’t belong at Aviara middle school
Dear
msX ~
I go to a rich school a trendy snobby school where I’m
not being treated the way I should be. see I transferred into another district I’m supposed to go to a school called
San Marcos middle school all of my old friends go there it is an ugly run down school but people are nicer there
and people that I haven’t met yet who go there respect me already I know I would fit in there at Aviara Oaks to
be popular all you have to do is drive up in a Mercedes if your rich your in whatever happened to being popular
for being a nice person and having a good personality the boys constantly make fun of my name its Giselle and they
say Jizzelle cause jizz is sperm and they call me jezebel in other words a she devil this year my grades have dropped
I went to an honor roll student to almost failing the girls call me a lesbian I don’t know why I’m very pretty
they just don’t like me for some stupid reason and the boys think I stuff an amazing thing happened though a boy
at the other school likes me an invited me to go to the movies with him he is very popular and I feel wanted at
the other school I hate feeling so left out.
msX says~
Stop whining. Whiny people are fun to provoke because their reaction is so obvious. You're new at their school
and it's obvious you're unhappy. You're criticizing their school, their lives, everything about them, and they
are defending it by picking on you. If you don't like it, learn to keep it to yourself and you'll get picked on
less. Finding friends has less to do with being rich, pretty, or popular than it does about being compatible.
Grow up, kid.
ms. X
Period Problem
Dear
msX ~
Hi, I got my period last summer and it's been pretty "on schedule" up until now. The last two times it
has been a week early, and this time it was super early--only 19 days since the last one! Isn't it supposed to
be 28 days?? Is anything wrong with me? I heard that periods come irregularly for awhile; is this just an irregularity
that everyone deals with?? Or should I do something about it? PLEASE HELP!
msX says~
This is a medical question. A good time for a first visit with a gynecologist is when a girl first gets her period.
Have mom make an appointment and go with a list of all your questions.
ms. X
"I feel like I’m not supposed to be here."
Dear
msX ~
My 12 year old daughter explains her feelings as "I
feel like I’m not supposed to be here, I don't fit in anywhere". She says this whether she's at her dad's
or with me (we've been divorced since she was two years old and she has always spent alternate weeks with one parent.}
She is now saying it after being in middle school for only one week. She's so sad. Help! What is going on here?
msX says~
The arrangements you made for your daughter may not fit her anymore. She's adolescent and more focused on her peers.
Moving from parent to parent on alternate weekends wrecks havoc with her budding social life. Things happen when
she's away, she misses the continuity of the action. Maybe you and her father need to rethink these arrangements.
Breakfasts on the weekend, dinners during the week, she's not the youngster she once was and her needs are different
now. Include her, of course, in the final outcome, and if need be, by all means, consult a professional for short-term
counseling.
ms. X
Does he still want me?
Dear
msX ~
I have a boyfriend that I love very much and he says
that he loves me, but lately he’s been acting very different towards me. He left for a 3 week trip to California
and just before that he started acting very different towards me. He hardly ever calls me I haven’t seen him since
he left for California. I found out that he cheated on me earlier in our relation ship, but we talked things out
for a while and got back together. We have a pretty big gap between our ages I’m 14 and he just turned 18 I’m not
sure that has any thing to do with why he’s been acting so weird because it never seemed to bother him before.
He never talks to me the way he used to. I’m not sure if their is some thing bothering him or if theirs someone
else. Does this mean that he doesn’t want me any more? How should I confront him with all my questions? Please
help me.
msX says~
You know how I feel about fourteen year olds dating eighteen year olds. Not good. He's out of line and you're still
a baby. He could get in serious trouble with someone as young as you are.
ms. X
Torn
Dear
msX ~
HELP!!! I am torn between my boyfriend and my best friend!!!
Recently I got back together with my ex who I had dated for a year! The only problem is that before hand I had
been talking to my best friend who is in the navy alot, and I had started to develop feelings for him. My navy
friend and I had talked about getting back together once he came home in September, and I was really excited, since
I had a crush on him since sophomore year in high school (I will now be a sophomore in college). Well, to complicate
things, one day I got a phone call from my ex, who is in the marines. We talked for an hour and a half, and close
to the end of the conversation he told me that he wanted me back, that he missed me and that he wanted us to be
together . . the only problem is that he was going to be shipped off to Japan for 6 months in 3 days. I tried to
convince him that it would be best to wait till he came home, but he said that he thought that we could make this
work, and that he was willing to if I was. So I told him that I did want to be with him and that I had since the
day that we had broken up. I love my ex very much, but at the same time I believe that I am starting to fall for
my best friend. I don’t want to risk loosing him as a friend, and I don’t want to loose a chance to be back with
my first love. What should I do? Some of my friends think that I should just go for my best friend, since my boyfriend
is in Japan, so we are not really "dating". Please help me MsX!!!
msX says~
Write your ex in Japan, but don't put your life on hold for him. See the other guy, your best friend, and give
him the chance he deserves. Japan can't expect that you'll be sitting home waiting anyway. See where your heart
really leads.
ms. X
Still in Love?
Dear
msX ~
I was with a boy Dave for 4 months, it ended about 9
months ago, during those 9 months I have had another boyfriend but during that relationship I realized I didn't
like him near as much as I like Dave. I miss Dave incredibly, but we never talk, and I think he may have another
girlfriend. I do not want to even try to talk to him because that would me approaching him, if he was interested..
wouldn’t he approach me? School starts soon and I was thinking maybe contact with him there may make things different...I
am impatient!:( Thank you for your time and thoughts.
msX says~
There's no rule that the boy has to be the one to make the first move, is there? I mean that went out with poodle
skirts and bobby sox, didn't it? If you like him and want to take a chance on finding out he likes you back, ask
him. Otherwise, just wait and wait and wait.
ms. X
Scared
Dear
msX ~
I know this is for girls, but I’m a seventeen year old
guy who needs some advice. two weeks ago me and one of my friends (another guy) were coming home from work and
when we went to his house we started fooling around. not anything serious just kissing and touching, but I’m really
freaked out. I never in any way thought I could be gay or anything and the fact that this was a close friend is
so weird. we haven’t talked since then and I’m scared he is going to tell someone. I don’t know what to do.
msX says~
He's probably just as scared you'll talk. I wouldn't worry. I don't know who initiated it, but it's not something
a guy would spread around, knowing how cruel people can be. I don't know what it means either. That answer lies
inside your head.
ms. X
feeling hated
Dear
msX ~
My dad and I always argue about my "attitude"
and it has gotten to the point of him wanting me out of his house. He thinks I am ungrateful and rude, but I don't
even feel like I am that bad. I get good grades, and I try really hard to please him and my mom, but nothing seems
to be right. I am always wrong and I feel like he hates me. I feel like asking him if he hates me because I don’t
want to cause them any more heartache ~ I would rather move out than make my family's life miserable. I don't want
to leave and I love my parents... I just want to make them happy, but I don't know what to do. Please help soon.
msX says~
Sit down and talk to him when there's no anger involved. Take turns and listen to each other. You sound like you
have a good head on your shoulders. Opening the lines of communication should enable you guys to work out a livable
solution.
ms. X
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