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will I ever be discovered??
Dear
msX ~
I have always wanted to become a successful poet. I knew I would have to gain experience along the way since I
am too young to really do much since I have to concentrate on my grades. I always felt that if someone in this
world should be discovered for talent it should be me because of the praise I always get from people when I read
then my poetry. But not long ago a friend of mine, who barely writes, entered a contest and won $100 barely trying!
I have entered so many contests and I never won any money! I feel like such a failure, HELP! please, tell me what
should I do to reassure myself I'm still a good writer, please respond!
Dear Poet,
The only advice I can give you is to keep writing...poems, journals, letters, whatever. Learn as much as you can
about good writing and literature while you are in school. Take classes. Hone your craft. But, be realistic. Most
writers struggle a long, long time before their work is appreciated. And, don't be jealous of your friend's success.
There's room for more than one more writer in this world.
ms. X
curious
Dear
msX ~
I wanna know if teens in Texas can legally move out at 17?
Dear Curious,
You need to speak to a lawyer or other child advocate. I don't know the answer to this question, but once you are
eighteen, it will be a moot issue. It's getting closer every day.
ms. X
Shyness
Dear
msX ~
Hi...I am in 11th grade. I have been shy my whole life and it is something that I have really struggled with. In
ninth grade, I decided to talk to a teacher about how it was bothering me. It really helped to get it all out and
stuff. It was probably the bravest thing that I have ever done. I am still working with this teacher and she is
helping tremendously but we are running out of ideas. We have read into a tape recorder and done role playing.
Do you have any other ideas. Shyness is this horrible thing that plays an active role in my life daily. I would
never wish it upon anyone. I would really like to keep working with this teacher and hopefully overcome my shyness.
Please help me!
Colette :)
Dear Shyness,
I agree it is a terrible thing and commend you're being proactive in changing your life. What helps many is to
realize that no one's judging them who really matters and whatever action they do today is more often forgotten
tomorrow. Acting classes have helped many people...pretending you are someone else is very liberating. Also, I've
heard of people using biofeedback and anti-depressant drugs (under medical supervision) to combat extreme shyness.
Reward yourself for being so brave and refusing to let yourself be pigeon-holed as a shy one for the rest of your
life!
Good luck,
ms. X
New State
Dear
msX ~
I don't even know where to begin. I just recently moved to another state about 1/2 a year ago. I'm currently a
senior in high school and I have tried everything to make friends. I'm not used to this at all. I used to be liked
and I had a lot of friends in the past. I have tried to hang out with a couple of people and they seemed to like
me when I met them at parties and clubs but the next day in school they wouldn't speak to me, not even the guys.
I just don't know what to do. I'm beginning to think that there is something wrong with me. I'm not a very outgoing
person and I know that's not the reason for this. I have just tried every possible thing, and I just can't find
anyone here, and what I want to know is what I could do to be part of their group. Please help me! Thanks
Dear New State,
Senior year is almost half over. Next year you will be working and/or in college and will be meeting new people
galore. People who won't see you as the new kid or someone intruding into their little set clique. So it is only
a matter of time. You might still want to befriend someone from school, but I would approach people individually
and not in groups. People act differently when they are surrounded by their friends, but when they are separate,
the absence of peer pressure makes them more receptive. Give it a shot, and remember, this won't last forever.
ms. X
close friend
Dear
msX ~
I am a junior in high school, and 16 years old. I went to school with a girl in 7th and 8th grade, and haven't
really talked with her a lot until lately. Now I see her every weekend because we play volleyball. I talk with
her a lot and we are good friends again. When I see her playing I get turned on and really want to be with her.
I'm pretty sure she likes me but not sure. What should I do?
Dear Close Friend,
Ask her to have pizza with you after volleyball.
ms. X
confused
Dear
msX ~
I like this guy and he’s a friend of the family. its hard to talk about it around my mom because I’m trying to
keep it a secret. I don’t want her to know because she’s good friends with his mom and I’ve known them since I
was five. I don’t get to see him that much either. should I just keep it quiet or should I just leave him alone?
Dear Confused,
Don't let your mom stand in your way, but don't advertise the fact until it's a done deal. That will save everyone
the embarrassment should it not work out.
ms. X
My
Best Bud is a Liar
Dear
msX ~
I'm 16 and I've been best friends with this girl for 13 years but she's been lying to me and telling me that she
doesn't smoke cigarettes or pot but I know she does, and it's been going on for a long time. I don't know why she
hides it because I don't care...I just want her to tell me the truth because we are supposed to be best friends.
I want to confront her but I'm afraid that we'll get in a huge fight about it and I don't wanna lose her as a friend
(i don't have that many friends as it is). What should I do/say? Help!!!
Dear My Best Bud is a Liar,
Maybe she is embarrassed to tell you the truth. Go easy. Friends forgive each other, most anything. You can say
you're worried about her, but you must accept her right to screw her own life up if that's what she chooses to
do.
ms. X
should we be more?
Dear
msX ~
I do admit I feel kind of selfish when I ask this because I know that there are many people in the world with problems
worse than mine but it is really getting to me. There is this boy in my school who I am quite good friends with
but lately I have become more and more attracted to him. So been the obnoxious person that I am I told him . We
left it a couple of days until we found the courage to discuss it and he said he didn’t want to be more than friends
with me...BUT...this week he has told his friend who is in my form that he regrets saying that and he does want
to be more than friends. Simple, you may think but in the time that we were back to normal(just friends) I came
to realize that maybe its best if we stay the way we are. After all if we were to fall out as a couple then I have
lost a great friend. I am in two minds about it because I think it would be great if we were a couple, as do all
our friends, but then again I don’t want to lose a great friend. Help me please because its making me crazy.
Lots of love
Dear Should We Be More,
I'd just leave it alone and see what he does with it. Making no move is a good move. See what develops and choose
your words carefully in future situations.
ms. X
confused in love
My boyfriend and I have been together for two years, off and
on. The problem is my love has a baby with another female, he says he loves his child but does not care for the
mother of his child any longer. Here is the problem.... The mother and his baby now live in his house, he claims
it is because her parents no longer approve of her. I told my boyfriend that I would no longer be with him, which
hurts very badly. Recently he has told me he is going to move out and get his own place to live and that everything
will be the way that it used to be. So in the meantime, he is at his house with her and talking to him is impossible
unless I see him in town or he calls me from a pay phone. I love him very much and I have given everything to him,
although he has not treated me right in the past. I know he does love me also. All of my friends say that when
we are together my face lights up and I am a different person. So my question is this.....should I stick in there
and endure these hard times or should I go on because I am still young and there are plenty of people out there?
I have tried doing that several times before but it hurts too bad and fells as if something is missing.
Please help!
Dear Confused In Love,
This is not a healthy situation. I would absorb the hurt now and get it over with, because it's likely to hurt
more if you wait. That child will always be there, even if the mother isn't. I'd move on and find someone who doesn't
have all these encumbrances even if it hurt like hell. There's someone out there for you who can love you and make
you the center of his world. This guy is in no position to do that now or in the future.
Good luck,
ms. X
in
love with good friend
Dear
msX ~
I met a guy about two or three months ago and we became really good friends. When he came home from school for
Christmas break, we hung out almost everyday of the vacation and towards the end of the time off we started to
cuddle a little bit when we watched movies together. Then he went to school, and I went to visit him the second
weekend he was away from me because I missed him so much, so I spent the night at his dorm. We really didn’t do
anything interesting that night except watch 4 movies and we were up til all hours, but we ended up kissing that
night. I had such a good time with him and I think that was when I realized that I liked him alot. I went home
the next day and we still spoke everyday afterwards, then one day he said something to me about what had happened.
He told me that he liked me alot but he has so much fun with me without hooking up that he didn’t want us to become
a solely hooking up relationship, and that he didn’t want to do anything to ruin our friendship. He also said the
last thing he would ever ever want to do would be to hurt me. I asked him if he wanted anything more than friends
and he said he thought that we would be better off as friends. Of course I was a little upset but I wasn’t going
to push anything. This past weekend I went to visit my other friend that goes to school with him and we ended up
spending the night together again, just kissing and small fooling around--same as last time, only this time I was
intoxicated. This encounter totally screwed things up because now I don’t know what he was thinking. He isn’t the
type of guy to do something if he knows it would hurt me or our friendship so I figure he hooked up with me because
he feels the same way as I do for him. I don’t know how to act around him, whether or not I should continue to
talk to him, or even hook up with him, what he is thinking....I just really need help. all my friends say to leave
it alone and go with the flow but I don’t want to leave it be and then miss my chance with him. I have a feeling
that he does feel the same way for me but he wants to have a good time at school and have the freedom to kiss other
girls without having to worry about his girlfriend back home. What do you think I should do?
Dear In Love With Good Friend,
If you are willing to accept being the body he turns to when there's no one else, then do it. But, I have a feeling
that if you make a life for yourself with other friends, he will begin to pursue you more. When you're always there
and available, you get used. When you are hard to get, you might find yourself more desirable to him. I think it's
worth a try.
ms. X
too much cousin
Dear
msX ~
I have a problem with my cousin. She is the only girl cousin my age I have so we are kinda forced to be friends.
She is always bossing me around and being rude. She always comes over my house and stays for a week b/c she lives
in Pennsylvania and I live in new jersey. She asks her mom if she can come to my house for a week and her mom talks
to my mom so its all set-- she is coming over. nobody asks me if I want her over. They just assume I do. My other
friends are so much nicer than her so I tell them my problem. I grow to hate her when I don't see her too. You
see, a long time ago when me and my cousin were 8, she asked me(right in front of her mom like she still does so
I have to say yes)if we could be Christmas vacation, pen pals. We still are. Now she is being rude and bossing
me around in her letters. She ruins my Christmas vacations. She come over and I can't have any fun. We just have
to do everything she wants to do. This past Christmas vacation, she came over my house and I had just gotten a
new computer game. Every morning, she would wake me up and say Jenny if you don't get up in ten seconds I’m going
downstairs to play the computer alone and she did--so I didn't come down until 30 minutes later.:) then she was
rude:( if something doesn't happen her way--she's mad. She is a jerk to her mother and acts as if her dad is dead,
complains about the full-page front and back letters I send her and say as they are a little bigger than a paragraph.
She's the one who sends me a half a page letter double spaced. I give her stuff alot and she doesn't say thank
you. She does so much mean rude and bossy things that I wish she would move far far away. She calls me annoying
all the time when I hardly ever do anything. Usually when she says that I didn't do something annoying I just--here
I’ll give you an example: I have to brush my teeth she already has its 8:00 and she has to sleep. So I get up and
turn on the light to go brush my teeth and she says: Jenny stop turn it off I’m serious Jenny stop your so annoying
gosh Jenny what’s your problem. She makes me fall asleep crying. :'( We are completely different I don't mean to
be mean or self centered but she is all flower power and I’m well cool. She buys anything w/ hearts stars bears
happy faces, etc. I can't not be friends w/ her can I? because my mom and hers are sisters so I’ll get in trouble
and never hear the end of it. Please help me what should I do?
Dear Too Much Cousin,
What are you, a doormat? You have to speak up for yourself. Tell your cousin directly that you don't appreciate
her input and negativity. Who appointed her God? Be firm. People like that are usually very insecure themselves
and have a need to put down others to feel superior. Don't let her get away with it.
ms. X
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