February 9th, 2000
Clearly I am working too hard. The past few days I have ALMOST
forgotten about you guys and last night, I did.
It's actually Wednesday. Hee hee hee. My face is red. Here is more news, as I see it.
Britney Spears. There she goes again just trying to pass herself off as a typical teen.
During an interview with People magazine, while getting her nails done in "typical teenager fashion"
by her manicurist at the exclusive Frédéric Fekkai salon on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills, she went
on a little bit about Brad Pitt.
"He's the ultimate! His features aren't perfect, but I like it when he's really rough-looking. He's soooo
Well, she does have something there. That's not only typically teen, it's typically white trash trailer park full
grown mom, too. I can attest to that one from personal experience.
Here's my problem with the whole "typical teen" thing. Did you get a chance to see her at the American
Music Awards? She poured herself into a sparkling Chloé jumpsuit that consisted of nothing more than two
small bandages over her nipples and some gauze covering her other unmentionables. I swear I
thought her boobs were going to slip right out on the way to the stage.
Is that a typical teen? Well, maybe "typical teen guilty of blowing her way to the top." I can tell you,
as a parent, there is no way my daughter would ever leave the house that way. Not unless she was carrying a credit
card processing machine in order to get maximum revenue out of that outfit.
Britney even counts Britain's 17-year-old Prince William, with whom she says she has exchanged e-mail, as a fan.
Well, I guess it's better than a Spice Girl in the palace.
"She is a glorified 1950s high school cheerleader with an undertone of perverse 1990s sexuality," says
feminist author Camille Paglia. "Britney is simultaneously wholesome and ripely sensual. She's Lolita on aerobics."
Lolita on aerobics? Egad. Could this just be jealousy that spurns me on? Never once have I been referred to as
a Lolita on aerobics. Mother Theresa on Prozac, maybe. Lolita? Never.
Brittany, honey. Put on some clothes. If you won't listen to me, listen to your family.
"Lately I've been telling her she needs to put on more clothes instead of some of the outfits she ends up
wearing," says her brother Bryan, 22, a sports-administration major at Southwest Mississippi Community College.
"She won't listen to me. She says, "You have no style. I've got this great boob job and I'm not going
to waste it on mock turtle necks and granny sweaters!"
She's done a lot of changing since she first appeared in her video, " . . . Baby One More Time," Jive
had asked her to do a cartoonish superhero theme, entitled "Super BOOB job!", but Spears insisted on
a racier schoolgirl motif.
"I did not raise a promiscuous daughter," says her mother, Lynne. "Day to day, Britney dresses like
any other kid. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go blow Ted Turner now."
Actor James Doohan, best known as Scotty the engineer on the
original "Star Trek'' television series, will be a father again just weeks after his 80th birthday, his agent
said Friday. Boy howdy. Now that's some sperm with staying power.
Wende Doohan, 43, is expected to give birth to the couple's third child, a girl, on April 1, according to the actor's
agent, Steve Stevens. James Doohan turns 80 March 3.
The pregnancy was an accident, but the couple is ''thrilled,'' Stevens said.
Wende stated, "We're going to teach little Scotty how to man the controls on his father's respirator! It'll
be ever so much fun!"
"Ally McBeal'' co-star Lisa Nicole Carson is recovering
at home following a two-week hospital stay for treatment of an undisclosed medical condition, a publicist for the
show's producer said Tuesday.
Undisclosed? This reporter hears it was a full-fledged mental break down with scads of nudity and narcotics involved.
In fact, I am willing to bet, that trussing up those huge hooters in her outfits like she has been finally deprived
her brain of necessary sanity oxygen.
Carson, 30, who plays prosecutor Renee Radick, the close friend and housemate of Calista Flockhart's title character
on the popular Fox television legal series, was hospitalized for ''a couple of weeks'' and was discharged earlier
this week, Hollywood publicist Pat Kingsley said.
She said details of Carson's medical condition were being kept private at the request of the actress' family. Not
being kept private, however, are her boobs which will continue to go on current public speaking engagements without
That's it for now!
See you all tomorrow.....unless I forget! :P