December 31, 1998

It's time for a review of the highlights of the past year of Days! First, there was . . . well, I can't seem to think of any, so how about a synopsis instead?

Lucas has "borrowed" Nicole from Eric.
Lucas: I just got back from visiting Victor Kiriakis. Some of his first words after his stroke were asking me to stay with him, but I had to visit you instead.
Nicole: You are SO sweet. Hey, I've heard of Victor Kiriakis; he was such a successful business man. It's always too bad when someone who gets money and power through blackmail and intimidation gets sick.
Lucas: Well, the stroke was Sami's fault, as is the fact that you like Eric better than me and the fact that the sky is blue.
Nicole: You said you wanted to talk to me about business?
Lucas: I want to expand to movies, and I think you'd be a natural as an actress.
Nicole: Watch a tape of this show, and think again!

MEANWHILE, Sami is worried about Lucas.
Sami: Lucas and Kate want revenge on me, and just because I've been blackmailing Kate for years and lying to Lucas about his relationship to Will and then saying Lucas hit Will when he didn't. I had to prove they framed me.
Austin: So . . . you . . . walked . . . over . . . there . . . with . . . a . . . gun . . . in . . . your . . . hand?
Sami: Well, yes.
Austin: That . . . was . . . . stupid.
Sami: You know it's bad when Austin tells you you're acting stupid.
Roman: But from now on, we'll handle things my way.
Sami: By wandering around mumbling about a duck?
Roman: No, by keeping you away from Lucas.
Austin: I'll . . . make . . . sure . . . she . . . stays . . . away. It's . . . not . . . like . . . I . . . have . . . a . . . wife . . . or . . . a . . . life . . . or . . . anything.
Sami: You and Carrie are having problems?
Austin: We . . . don't . . . communicate . . . any . . . more. Maybe . . . because . . . her . . . vocabulary . . . is . . . so . . . much . . . bigger . . . than . . . mine. She's . . . just . . . not . . . the . . . same . . . person . . . I . . . married. It's . . . almost . . . as . . . if . . . she . . . had . . . a . . . new . . . head . . . writer.

MEANWHILE, Carrie is also of concern to the gang at the hospital.
Ali: Mike and I had an ALMOST perfect evening. It would have been perfect, except he didn't want me around.
Nancy: Did you follow him to the hospital when he left?
Ali: No. Why would I do something obsessive and psychotic like that? I hid in his closet and got into bed with him.
Nancy: Look, Laura apparently got her license back. Go talk to her.
(Ali leaves)
Craig: Our Mike-Carrie plan doesn't seem to be working.
Nancy: Well, one of the nurses told me that a very angry Austin stormed out of here earlier.
Craig: How could she tell an angry Austin from a happy Austin or a shocked Austin or a sad Austin?
(nearby)
Carrie: Mike, I just seem to be upset a lot lately. As opposed to the last five years, when I was always worried about whether I'd ever marry Austin, or the ten years before that when my parents were dying and coming back to life with alarming regularity.
Mike: I know all about your love triangle, especially since I'm part of it.
Carrie: Austin accused me of being like Sami.
Mike: Maybe if he thinks that, he'll spend as much time with you as he does with her. Good going.
Carrie: And Marlena told me that I feel more than friendship for you. Oh my God, she's right.
Mike: You'd almost think she was a psychiatrist or something.

MEANWHILE, Bo and Hope have troubles of their own.
Hope: (to phone) Who is this?
Thug:
(to phone) Kidnappers always announce exactly who they are.
Hope:
(to phone) You don't have my son.
Thug:
(to phone) He's not with you.
Hope:
(to phone) And what else is new?
Bo:
(grabbing phone) Son, son, what's the name of our boat?
Shawn-Douglas:
(to phone) The Fancy Face Two! Gee, no one could guess the answer to that question.
(they hang up)
Hope: This can't be happening, just because it has happened to every other family in Salem. Bo, don't call the police. The kidnappers said not to, and it's not like we're cops who've had training in this kind of situation or anything. I really hope you know what you're doing, out son's life depends on it.
Bo: Thanks, I'd forgotten.
Hope: Where are you going?
Bo: To find DiMera! You sit by the mobile phone!!

End of Show
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Disclaimer: This page is for entertainment purposes only and has no affiliation with Days of Our Lives, Ken Corday, or NBC. The characters and storylines parodied are under copyright by them and are used without permission here. The parodies themselves are written and copyright by me. Again, this page is intended to be fun, so please don't sue me.
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