Thursday, July 27, 2000

Tomorrow, tomorrow, they squish him tomorrow . . .

Baby John needs to be rushed to the hospital. You'd think Salemites would have learned that it's a jinx to call your kid that.
Bo: John, I don't want you to come to the hospital with us. You remind me of how this whole mess got started.
John: You're mad at me but not at Stefano?
Bo: Yep.
John: Makes sense.

MEANWHILE, Lexie brings Baby Isaac home.
Lexie: He's so healthy. Why couldn't Bo and Hope have been so lucky?
Abe: Hang on a minute, Lex. I need to find a dictionary so I can look up "irony."

MEANWHILE, John and Belle wait with Shawn-not-Douglas.
John: I'll help build Mimi's house.
Belle: That's not what I wanted from you.
John: What DID you want?
Belle: Same thing as always. Your credit card.
John: Okay, I'll buy the lot.
Belle: Great. It's in a trashy part of town.
John: So the Lockhearts will fit right in.
Shawn-not-Douglas: Hey, why haven't my parents come back yet?
John: Something must be wrong. They left all of five minutes ago.
(John and Shawn-not-Douglas drive to the hospital. As there was no room in the car for Belle, they boil her alive so Bo and Hope can have Belle Soup to eat when they get home.)

MEANWHILE, Sami and Brandon are in Italy.
Sami: You're the best friend I've ever known. Austin, Lucas, Jamie . . . they were never nice to me.

MEANWHILE, at the Kiriakis Mansion:
Lucas: Nicole just asked me for a divorce out of the blue. The fact that she's always picking fights with me and telling me she hates me and wants Eric didn't clue me in that this might happen. But maybe she still loves me . . .
Victor: You're delusional.
Lucas: About time someone noticed.

MEANWHILE, the Amazing Walking Hormone and Nicole are in bed yet again.
Eric: I have no choice. I have to go. I have a contract with ABC.
(leaves to bid Roman adieu)
Eric: I love Nicole.
Roman: Eric, that's lust, not love. I'm not going to stand here and listen to this crap!
Eric: The viewers do.
Roman: SHE'S A SLUT! A WHORE!
Eric: Although I've never won a fight before in my life, I will now punch a trained cop's lights out.
Roman:
(getting up) I'll love you unconditionally as long as you dump Nicole.
Eric: I know it worked when you asked Carrie to choose between you and Austin and Sami to choose between you and Franco, but it won't work this time.
Roman: Hmm.

End of Show
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