Tuesday, May 16, 2000

Welcome to Tuesdayís Synopsis. No guest appearances, but some of your favorites:

Hope "less" Williams, Bo "zo" Brady, Shawn "I look sixteen, really" Brady, Shawn "I want my name back" Brady, Caroline "where did I put Max?" Brady, Roman "Chris" Brady, Eric "two months and Iím outta here" Brady, Sami "one year and Iím outta here" Brady, Will "only kid in Salem" Roberts, Lucas "remember two years ago? when I had a personality?" Roberts, Kate "I miss Viv" Roberts, Austin "Duh-Boy" Reed, Victor "Corleone" Kiriakis, Philip "they fired Viv for ME?" Kiriakis, Mimi "and ME?!" Lockheart, Chloe "Woman in Black" Lane, Craig "Daddy" Wesley, Nancy "Iím a heroine! Carrie who?" Wesley, Marlena "chip envy" Evans, Belle "Skipper" Black, John "Squinty" Black, Greta "Alligator Breath" Von Amburg, Abe "killer" Carver, Lexie "daddyís little girl" Carver, Stefano "Teddy Bear" DiMera, Alice "thirty-five years and counting" Horton, Mickey "flunked the bar" Horton, Maggie "own the bar" Horton, Julie "not sure what Iím doing here actually" Williams, Doug "same goes" Williams, Nicole "Street" Walker, Brandon "Dog" Walker, and Fay "Jay" Walker.


Abe and Lexie make up.
Abe: We need to see each otherís point of view.
Lexie: Great! That means you look at things my way and I donít look at things your way, right?
(Lexie drags Abe out into the night. They knock on a door.)
Bo: (answering) Hi! Donít look so surprised! Whose door did you think you were knocking on?
Abe: Jack and Jenniferís.
Bo: Itís just a coincidence that this house looks just like theirs and your house looks just like Roman and Marlenaís and Brandonís loft looks just like Johnís.
Abe: So whereís Shawn-not-Douglas?
Bo: At Belleís funeral. She died trying to help him set up his room. I donít know how he got all that stuff on the boat.
Hope: He didnít. You always made him go stay with your parents so we could make out on the boat.

MEANWHILE, with Lexieís sainted father:
Stefano: Susan, I mean Marlo, is in labor? This cannot be! I forbid it! I know sheís only going into labor to tick me off! Women have complete control over these things! (calls Lexie) What day is Hope due? I want to get her a special present.
Lexie:
(on phone) Youíre getting her a present? Youíre the sweetest man in all of Salem!

MEANWHILE, at the strip club:
Eric: Iíve seen the good in you, Nicole. I canít say exactly *where* I saw it because this is a PG-rated synopsis, but I have seen it.
(Nicole heads off as Eric goes to see Sami.)
Sami: Arenít you gonna ask what your sisterís doing in a strip club?
Eric: First can I ask why youíre wearing your hair like the average twelve-year-old does?
Sami: Never mind that. Daddyís here and you donít want him to see you with Nicole.
(Roman comes out and Eric hides.)
Roman: Wait for me outside, I have to use the menís room.
Sami: NO! You canít!
Roman: Why?
Sami: Um, youíre a guy. Do it outside.
Roman: Goodbye, Sami.
(Goes back in and sees Eric.) Eric! Nicole! Did *she* drag you down here?
Eric: Sheís a woman. Iím a man. I wonder whose idea it was to come to a strip club.
Roman: I donít want you hanging around her. I know how it feels to be rejected, but at least your mother and I got out of our marriage with our self-respect intact.
Eric: Yeah, you skipped town a few days after your younger daughter was raped and didnít talk to any of your kids for years and she wound up possessed.
Roman: Drop Nicole!
Eric: No!
Roman:
(puzzled) Gee, that line of reasoning worked so much better when I tried to keep Carrie away from Austin and Sami away from Franco.

End of Show

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Disclaimer: This page is for entertainment purposes only and has no affiliation with Days of Our Lives, Ken Corday, or NBC. The characters and storylines parodied are under copyright by them and are used without permission here. The parodies themselves are written and copyright by me. Again, this page is intended to be fun, so please don't sue me.
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