July 25, 1997

Bo is looking for Billie.
Bo: I heard an American is in trouble in Rome. Look at this picture. Is it her?
man: Yes, she's the one. We know who she is and that's she's in trouble but we aren't doing anything about it.
Bo: So you got the Salem Police Training Video.
man: Uh-huh.
Bo: So Billie is in trouble.
man: Yes. Her soap is written by a misogynist with sado-masochistic tendencies.
Bo: The poor viewers.

MEANWHILE, Hope is at Alice's.
Hope: I love Bo and I want to be with him.
Franco: But Bo will urt your feelinks, Ope.
Hope: I'm glad you talked me out of talking to him.
Franco: You'har easily convanced, Ope.
Hope: I need a new place to live. Shawn-D needs his own room.
Franco: E nefer ad is own room on your boa.
Hope: We had Shawn-D when we lived on the boat?
Franco: Nefer min'. Come an lif with me. We coul spen all'hour time together.
Hope: How would that be different? Besides, don't you live in the Brady Pub?
Franco: If John, an Kristen an Marlena and Roman ca do'hit, then you an Bo an Beeelee an I could do'hit.

MEANWHILE, the usual suspects are visiting Roman.
Mike: Carrie, your dad is dying.
Carrie: This is awful. I was hoping he could give me away when I married Austin.
Mike: He probably wasn't going to live to be 150 anyway.
Kate: (eavesdropping) Oh, no! I have to keep Carrie away from Mike. She'll LEARN to love Austin. I'll MAKE her love Austin. And I'll make Bo love Billie. Boy is that witch Sami evil.
Carrie: Mike, I'll go talk to my father now.
Mike: Sure.
Carrie: Hi, Daddy.
Roman: Hi, Punkin. Between you and Peanut, I can make a nice snack. So, do you love Mike?
Carrie: He's everything I could want.
Austin: (eavesdropping) Oh uh no uh now uh I uh can't uh get uh the uh annulment uh because uh Carrie uh doesn't uh love uh me. And uh all uh I uh ever uh did uh was uh marry uh her uh sister. Poor uh me. I uh won't uh talk uh to uh Carrie uh about uh everything uh because uh that uh way uh we uh can uh have uh another uh four uh years uh of uh this.

End of Show

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