|July 7, 1997
After four days off, Days made up for lost time with an episode that was really gre- no, that's not the word. Days was on today. That describes the situation. Here's what happened.
Austin, Mike, Lucas, and Carrie are looking for Sami.
Carrie: Well, this proves Sami is up to her old evil tricks.
Austin: No, I would know if Sami was evil again.
Carrie: You don't even know the alphabet.
Austin: It doesn't matter. All I want is to be with you. That's why I'm married to your sister.
Mike: This is irrelevant. Unless she used an alias, Sami isn't here.
Austin: Sami would never do anything as deceitful as using an alias. Besides, she would be recognized.
Lucas: Not if she wore a hat.
MEANWHILE, Hope and Franco are chasing Bo and Billie.
Hope: Franco, I was on the verge of entering a relationship with you after I spent months whining about how Bo didn't love me. But I didn't mean any of it, because I ALWAYS knew Bo loved me. Hey! Stop crying! Be happy for me, you jerk.
Franco: Yes, Hope. But I bet Bo's in bed with Billie right now.
Hope: Franco, you're such a good friend. Bo was wrong about you wanting to break us up.
MEANWHILE, John and Marlena are in bed.
John: Marlena, I was a fool.
Marlena: No, you were a loving, trusting, devoted fool.
John: Even though I was a fool, you have to sleep with me. It would make Roman happy.
Marlena: Remember how happy it made him last time?
John: Most days I don't even remember my own name. Let's take a bath.
Marlena: Is this heaven?
John: No, it's Iowa. Look at the dead people coming back to life in the baseball cornfield. Yikes, what if Roman comes back?
Marlena: Don't worry. you're my knight in shining armor. Want to get out of the bath?
John: No. My armor rusted and I can't move. Say, since I'm stuck here anyway, will you marry me?
Marlena: Hell no, you pig!
Charlie: (off camera) Deidre, what did I tell you about that?
Marlena: Oops. I mean, of course I'll marry you, my sweet John. Gasp. Gasp. Gasp.
End of Show
Disclaimer: This page is for entertainment purposes only
and has no affiliation with Days of Our Lives, Ken Corday, or NBC. The characters and storylines parodied are under
copyright by them and are used without permission here. The parodies themselves are written and copyright by me.
Again, this page is intended to be fun, so please don't sue me.