to the Message BoardCoffeerooms Ally McBeal

The show opens with Ally looking at her reflection in the mirror. She scrutinizes herself for awhile, and then screams and goes running to Renee. She tells her that she has a wrinkle, and wonders if it were there yesterday. Ally tells Renee she's getting old since she's having another birthday. Ally is turning 29.Renee warns her that the Biscuit had better not pull any of his tricks in court tomorrow. We learn that Ally and John are on opposite sides of a murder case with Renee.

Richard is conducting the morning meeting. Ally argues that in her case, Mr. Albert Shepley cut off his woman's hand as an act of love, but Nelle strongly disagrees with her, as does most of gang. Billy says they have a wrongful termination case, (about ageism) and that Georgia will assist him with it. That causes Georgia to raise her eyebrows, and give Billy a look. Elaine comes in, announcing that she has something planned for Ally's birthday. Ling asks her if it's the big 3-5. Ally retorts back that it's her 29th birthday, LinG (hard G). Nelle mentions that it's John's birthday too, and wants to do something for him. John says no way, and he and Ally leave for court.

Afterwards, Richard wants to talk to Ling about their relationship. Nelle catches John, and he says that birthdays make him uncomfortable. He's getting ready to hit the big 3-5 and he thinks he should be farther along in his life by now. Richard tells Ling that he wants to break up, he's tired of not getting any sex from her. Ling again tries to talk Richard out of sex, and tells him that he doesn't really want to break up. Ling teases him with the finger sucking thing, and the hair thing. Richard is left almost speechless, and Ling walks out of the room.

Billy and Georgia talk after the meeting, and Billy tells Georgia that he really wants to reconnect with her, and will do it in any way possible. Plus, if they land the new business, it will be beneficial if they ever go up for partner in the future. Their new client, Mr. Ross Fineman approaches them. They are both shocked at his hairstyle, a definite comb-over.

John and Ally are talking to their very nervous client, Mr. Shepley. Albert can't believe that anyone would think he would kill his wife. She was the love of his life. John mentions that Mr. Shepley did cut off his wife's hand. Albert agrees but says he didn't do it until after she was dead. Ally says the coroner can't prove that Mr. Shepley did it afterwards though. John tells him to stay calm, but stutters, and instead of saying something with the letter P, he settles for "Black and Decker."We now in the courtroom where Renee is questioning a police officer, about the night in question. The officer says that Mr. Shepley was pulled over for speeding and running a red light. He was acting suspicious, so they searched the car, and found the hand. The police then searched Mr. Shepley's house, and found the body of his wife, and arrested his for her murder. John is pulling some of his courtroom tricks, and Renee tries to appeal to Whipper. John turns it around on her, so Renee looks like a kid telling on a sibling for a prank. John takes his turn at questioning the police officer. He says that his client wasn't acting suspicious, he told the police about his wife dying, and the circumstances with the hand. John makes it look like the police officer was told what to say in the questioning.

Back to the courtroom, where a doctor is on the stand. The doctor says that Mrs. Shepley died from cardiac arrest. He says the trauma of the severed arm is what killed her. Ally gets the doctor to admit that he can't be sure which came first, the cardiac arrest, or the severing of the arm. Dr. Joyce Brothers is being questioned by John now, about Mr. Shepley's state of mind. She tries to explain how even a gentle man could become psychotic after a loss like his.

Georgia is complaining to Billy and Richard that she can't possibly work on the case with the "comb-over" man, Ross Fineman. They tell her she has to anyway. The opposing counsel arrives, and is ready to talk about the case. Mr. Fineman was fired because of his hair, because the comb-over is an attempt to conceal a lie.(that he's bald)He is an insurance agent, working for Joseph Court. Mr. Court claims that the hair style makes him appear less than honest. Mr. Fineman argues that his hair is all his own, and doesn't see what the big deal is. His work performance was up to standards, but apparently his appearance wasn't. Joseph's lawyer wants a viewing of Ross's hair, but Billy says no way are they going to turn this meeting into show and tell. He tells them if they want to do that, they'll need a court order. Georgia is about to burst out laughing, so she excuses herself, and hurries out of the room.

Ally and John tell Mr. Shepley that the DA offered to settle for manslaughter. They tell their client that it's something to think about, since the jury isn't likely to see his side of things. Mr. Shepley asks the two lawyers if they've ever been in love. Neither answer, and Ally says she's not sure how that has anything to do with it. John tells Mr. Shepley that it will be up to him to convince the jury that he's innocent, since he's not sure he can do so.

Elaine is practicing for her big birthday bash for Ally. Richard and Elaine have a talk about Ling. He says it's unnatural for them to not have had sex yet. Elaine offers to talk to Ling for him. Richard isn't sure how to answer that one.

Mr.Shepley is telling John about his wife's last few years. He says that he always used to hold her hand, no matter what they were doing. He said he couldn't let go of the idea of holding his wife's hand. He admits that it does sound morbid to cut off her hand, but he just couldn't let go. He was headed over to a relative's house, who's a mortician when he got stopped. Ally and John talk afterwards. They wonder how Mr. Shepley will hold up during Renee's cross examination. John believes that he is innocent. He's still thinking about what their client said about being in love. He mentions again how he's almost 35, and still has never been in love. John tells Ally that Nelle thinks that he's in love with Ally. He says that it's ridiculous though. Ally doesn't really say anything back. John takes Ally by surprise, and kisses her. John then apologizes, thinks better of it, and takes back the apology.

Billy and Georgia have their client in front of a judge. The opposing counsel and the ex-employer are also present. Opposing counsel is trying to talk the judge into allowing them to look under the comb-over. The judge thinks it's ludicrous and is surprised that Mr. Fineman was fired because of his appearance. Despite Billy's convincing argument, the judge allows the unveiling of the comb-over. Joseph's lawyer takes out a comb, and begins moving Mr. Fineman's hair around. It turns out that the comb-over is one huge piece of hair which is completely wrapped around his head. Georgia tries not to look, but curiosity gets the best of her. Ross wants to drop the lawsuit, but Billy talks him out of it. Opposing counsel takes a picture of the hair to preserve it for the record.


Renee is questioning Mr. Shepley about his wife. Renee tries to make it out like he wanted his wife to die, and hints that healthcare for her was really expensive. Renee pulls out a chainsaw and turns it on. She makes him out to be a murderer, while he insists that he didn't kill his wife, he loved her.

Elaine and Ling are having a talk about men, and Elaine pretty much tells her that if she wants to keep Richard around indefinitely she's going to have to have sex with him.

Billy announces that Mr. Court will rehire Ross if he'll get a haircut. Ross still doesn't think the comb-over is a big deal, and that no one really noticed it anyway. Georgia admits that everyone notices it, and it looks terrible. She says one of the lawyers (Ling) at the firm also does hair and that she could make him look great. She says he's still an attractive man, but he definitely is bald.

Ally and Renee are arguing about their case. Ally tells Renee that she's so jaded she can't even imagine that someone could actually be that in love with someone. Renee says she knows she has to take her client's side, but can't believe that Ally thinks it's romantic for her client to remove his wife's limb. Renee says that makes Ally hopeless.

Ally and John are talking about what Renee said to her. John tells her he's sorry that he kissed her. John says that maybe they are the pathetic ones, but Ally says that's the birthday blues talking. John says he's 35, and hasn't met anyone he would want to chop up, or anyone that would want to chop him up. He says he hasn't lived yet. Ally says to him that she thinks she should do the closing instead.

Renee is doing her closing and stresses the fact that sometimes "how it looks, is how it is." Ally takes her turn. She tries some of John's tactics, and tells the jury how today is her birthday. She tells the jury how Renee called her hopeless last night. Ally says that she has hope, and hopes to meet someone she can't bear to be without. She wants to have emotional dependency. She says that what Mr. Shepley did is a little crazy, but she hopes to find that kind of love one day. Ally finishes her closing and the whole room is in a dead silence.

Ling has arrived at the office, with the familiar Wicked Witch theme song playing. Elaine reminds her that she's due in to cut Mr. Shepley's hair. She says she'll be there in a minute, and goes storming into Richard's office. She is angry at him for talking to Elaine about their sex life. Richard says they don't have a sex life, which is what he talks about. Ling finally confesses why she's afraid of having sex with him. She says, "Richard, If I made love to you, you'd go blind. "She says that she's excellent in bed, and no matter what she does, it always comes down to being the best sex the man ever had. She's even ruined lives with her great talent. Then the man only wants sex, and she doesn't get anymore talking, movies, etc, just "sex, sex, sex. "Richard is just about speechless after this revelation. Ling says she likes Richard, and wants to get to know him first. Then she says she has to cut hair, and exits the room.

Ling walks in the room, grabs Mr. Fineman's long piece of hair, makes a few snips, then throws the hair down and leaves the room. Billy and Georgia are both quick to tell him how great the haircut looks. Mr. Fineman looks a bit puzzled, he obviously expected a little more than a quick hair snipping. Georgia tells him he looks great again, and he's not sure about it. He takes off to look in the bathroom mirror. Billy tells Georgia that she's a good person, and she smiles. Billy's relieved to finally see her smile, and says he'd like to work on their problems.

The jury is back, and the verdict is now being read. Renee is looking very confident, she's expecting to win. The verdict is read- "not guilty". Mr. Shepley is thrilled, and thanks Ally and John. Albert then asks Ally if it would be pushing things to ask for his wife's hand back. Ally says yeah, but he still looks happy with the jury's decision. John goes over to Renee and tells her that he thinks his client really is innocent. He leans over and kisses Renee, much to her surprise. John says, "Life is for the living, I like it."

Elaine is doing her singing number down at the bar, with the whole gang in attendance. John says that Elaine never sings for his birthday. Nelle says that's because he kept his birthday a secret. She admits that she has a surprise for him coming up. Renee shows up, and Ally's glad to see her, and they settle their little dispute is forgotten. Elaine comes over to Georgia and Billy's table where Mr. Fineman is sitting with them. Elaine starts to sing to Ross, and even sits down in his lap.

Ling and Richard are talking, and he says that now he knows she's so good in bed, he's lost all interest. (yeah, right! LOL) Ling is surprised that he's not intimidated, what if he can't please her? Richard says it's not about pleasing her, it's about pleasing him. Richard says he knows a way to drive her crazy, and does this little thing in her knee pit. She seems to get excited about it, and then he stops and says that he doesn't want her liking him for only that.


John's song by Barry White starts playing and Nelle says that's part of his present. Nelle looks really pleased with herself for making John so happy. Barry himself comes out of the shadows and comes up to John. John is totally shocked, and heads to the stage with his mouth open. He starts doing his little dance (like he does in the unisex when he's mentally preparing himself) in a circle around Barry. John is still in awe of his favorite singer, and is so happy. Ally says it's her birthday too, and she heads up to dance too, with the gang behind her. They all dance in a line at the stage as the credits roll.

summary by allyfan98

It is so funny we laugh hysterically, yet other parts can make you cry.
Special thanks to allyfan98
Photographs courtesy of Fox Network

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