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The show opens with a reporter interviewing Fish about a sexual harassment case. Fish tries to tell the jury, through the TV, that the sexual harassment laws are stupid, but Nelle tells him that he can’t have any contact with the jury, directly or indirectly. Fish says, "As if I care." He says that there is a lot of money riding on the case, and when the stakes are high enough, he will always speak his conscience.

Ally and Billy are in her office, preparing for a case. Greg comes in with flowers and a balloon for Ally. He tells Ally that he decided to stretch Valentine’s Day into two days this year, and a little cupid comes out from behind him and hits Ally in the forehead with an arrow. Ally says,
"I could get used to this," and Greg says, "Why don’t you then?" and kisses her. Looking on, Billy looks unhappy.

Ling and Richard are discussing her coming to work for the firm. Richard tells her that she would be an asset, but he wasn’t looking forward to taking on another body right now, but that if he were, it would be hers. Ling tells Richard that she enjoyed being a lawyer after the suit against God, and that she gets along with the people at the firm
"it seems organic." Richard is skeptical, but Ling tells him that it would make a lot of money for the firm, and that she wouldn’t have to make up excuses to see him. If she felt like sucking on his finger, he would be just an office away. Richard is speechless.

John and Nelle enter the bargaining room with the counsel from the opposing side, representing Cobb Company. The other side offers $125 thousand apiece per client, but Nelle rejects it. Another lawyer tells John and Nelle that their profile is high right now, and that if they settle, the reputation of the firm will still be good. If they go to court and lose, they will be humiliated. John counters by saying that if they lost the case, they could simply say that they were out-manned by the seven lawyers on the other side, and that the loss wouldn’t hurt him, but that if Cobb Company lost - and they would - it would look bad for the company.

Ally is in court, arguing against a clause in a will which prevented her client from inheriting if she remarried. Ally tries to argue that the restriction is invalid, but the judge disagrees and tells Ally that she has no case. A saw blade appears and cuts off Ally’s legs, and she begins beating the floor with one of her legs.

Nelle is examining a witness, Mr. Close, in the sexual harassment trial who claims that he and a coworker, Ms. Horn, were dismissed because they were dating each other. The lawyer for the company asks what the policy on inter-office dating is at Cobb Company. The witness says that there is "Date and Tell" policy-employees are supposed to disclose inter-office relationships, and sign a "Love Contract" which is supposed to protect Cobb Company against sexual harassment suits. The lawyers asks Mr. Close if he knew he was violating the rules, and he says yes. John asks Mr. Close why he didn’t tell and sign the contract, and Mr. Close says that he found it demeaning, and that they never tried to hide their relationship, but didn’t go around telling people, either. John asks how Mr. Close feels about Ms. Horn, and he says he loves her. John says that must be breaking all kinds of rules; we can’t have people going around loving each other. Opposing counsel objects, and John apologizes, saying he gets overwhelmed by common sense. The defense lawyers again objects, and the judge reprimands John. John says,
"For the record, the other six lawyers did not object." They all stand up and say, "Objection!" John says, "I stand corrected."

Ally and Billy get off the elevator while Ally says, that they can appeal the case. Billy wants to see Ally in her office, then accuses her of going out for a Valentine’s dinner instead of preparing for the case, and tells her that her performance reflected badly on him. He yells not to ever let that happen again. Ally tells him that she doesn’t work for him and even if she did, nobody speaks to her that way. The judges ruling was a reflection of his flaring hemorrhoids, not her argument, and once again, nobody talks to her that way. Billy asks her what she’ll do-complain?
"Gee, that’s a novel course of action!" he says. Georgia comes in and asks what’s going on, and Billy says it’s a difference of opinion. Richard comes in with Ling and says, "Good news! Ling’s decided to come aboard." Elaine drops her papers, and Georgia says, "You’re hiring her?!" and Ling growls. Georgia asks how Richard can hire Ling, and he says, "She licked my finger. I’m human. Asset, firm, bygones." Georgia and Ling glare at each other.

In the courtroom, Mr. Forsely, VP of Personnel at Cobb Company, is on the stand. He says that sexual harassment lawsuits are everywhere, so they have to set policies to protect themselves. He says that the sexual harassment law is ridiculous, not their policy. Nelle asks if the law precludes two employees hugging each other. Mr. Forsely says no, but that the policy forbids it because they have no way of knowing if the hugs are welcome or not. Nelle asks if the law prevents discussion of sexual activity, and Mr. Forsely says it does when it amounts to harassment. Nelle asks if their policy waits for it to constitute harassment, and Mr. Forsely says that since the line is so easily crossed, they felt a complete ban made sense. Nelle asks if anyone reading the Starr Report would be sanctioned, and Mr. Forsely says,
"That’s an easy one." Nelle says that it was national news-anyone talking about Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky would be defying the policy? Mr. Forsely says as silly as it sounds, discussing national news could amount to sexual harassment under today’s laws. Nelle says, "And if it means being silly to safeguard against’ll be silly." The opposing lawyers don’t look very happy about that statement.

John and Nelle get of the elevator, and Ally, Georgia, and Billy nab John and ask for a word with him. In his office, John says that Richard didn’t clear hiring Ling with him, but that he defers to Richard on those matters. Georgia says that Ling doesn’t have much experience, and
"on a tender day rises to the level of vicious." Ally says, "At least Nelle is a good lawyer, despite all her hair." John refuses to talk to Richard, and Richard walks in saying that Ling will only work on cases she brings to the firm, and it will be good for the firm. Billy says, "But mostly you," and Richard answers, "Here’s a flash, Billy: it’s my firm."

Nelle and John are meeting with their clients, and Nelle tells them that the company is doing a good job of painting themselves as victims of the sexual harassment law, and is advising them to settle the case. Mr. Close says he's worked in the company for six years, and the policy is more important to the company than he is. John tells them that they will fight, but that
"we don’t feel continent - er, confident."

Ally is in the unisex, and Billy comes in to apologize for losing his temper, but that it’s nothing personal. Ally says good - nothing personal; that’s the way she wants it. She turns away to leave, and Billy stops her and tells her that they need to talk. Ally tells him to let her go, because she’s not under him and never will be under him. Billy tells her that she'll end up under Ling because she’ll be their biggest client with her corporate ventures and in effect, their boss. Richard, Nelle, and John are on her side, which leaves him, Ally, and - and... Ally says,

Ling and Richard are playing Go, and Ling apologizes if he’s taking flak for hiring her. Richard says it’s good for the firm, and he’d do almost anything to
"introduce [his] penis to the inner you." Ling asks Richard if he’s ever had a hair tickle - she gives great hair. Richard says that he doesn’t know what she’s talking about, but he is getting aroused. Ling asks, "You mean that big-hair, blonde thing never caressed you with her hair? Maybe tomorrow I’ll give you a treat." Richard wants to know what’s wrong with now, and she says, "I need a candle." Richard tells her he’s got one and invites her to find out, and Ling says, "Tomorrow."

Billy and Ally are at dinner, discussing the fact that Nelle and Ling have two senior partners in their palms. Ally tells Billy that he’s overreacting. Then she asks Billy what’s wrong - is he dying or something? Billy asks her if she remembers that they said they’d be truthful with each other, while he loves Georgia, he’s never loved anybody like he loved and still loves Ally. When he saw Greg kissing Ally, his insides screamed, and he can’t keep it to himself any more. Ally says,
"I think you should have. I’m going to go. That was a little too much truth, Billy." Ally then runs home while Vonda sings.

At home, Ally tells Renee what happened, and Renee says,
"You guys tell each other you love each other all the time." Ally says this was more. Renee asks how she feels, and Ally says besides numb, she’d like to kill him. She's finally found somebody after being alone all this time, and it was a selfish thing for him to do. Renee says that’s what Ally thinks; what does she feel? Ally says that even if she knew her feelings they’re the last things she’d trust. Renee asks Ally how she feels about Greg of the top of her head, and Ally says, "Love him." Renee asks how Ally feels about Billy, and she says, "Love him."

John and Nelle are making their way through the halls of the courthouse with reporters following them. Nelle tells the Cobb company’s lawyers her clients will settle for $75 thousand apiece. The other lawyers say that they don’t want to settle - they think John and Nelle have made their case for them. John tells them his grandfather said,
"I dare not presume to assert for fear I may be in error." The other lawyer says, "Maybe you should let him first-chair."

Nelle tells John they don’t have a chance if he doesn’t close big, and Richard pulls him aside to ask him if he knows what it means to
"get hair." John says he doesn’t know, and Richard wonders if Billy would know. John tells him he has a big closing to prepare.

Ally is in her office, and Georgia comes in and says,
"Billy told me about your little talk." Ally, panicked, says, "He did? What did he say?" When Georgia says that they need to form an alliance because of Ling, Ally is relieved and falls over. Greg comes in and Ally asks him what he’s doing there, and he reminds her that they are going out to lunch. He says that he missed her the night before, and that it was the first time in three weeks that they hadn’t seen each other. He kisses her and Ally appears uncomfortable.

Ally goes into the unisex and checks for feet. While kneeling on the floor, the toilet flushes and a stall door opens and hits her in the behind and makes her hit her head - it’s Billy. Billy tells her they should talk, and she says that she doesn’t always think that talk is the best thing. Billy tries to convince her, and Georgia come in and asks if they’re still fighting, and tells Billy to leave Ally alone and leads him out. Ally goes into a stall.

John is walking back and forth barefoot, thinking, and Nelle comes in saying that maybe she could get the other lawyers to go back up to a hundred. John tells her that she’s a beautiful woman, and the law shouldn’t require it to go unsaid.

Ally tells Renee that
"tomorrow" has always been her favorite day of the week, but she’s never seen a tomorrow so scary. She’s falling in love with Greg, but when Billy looks at her in a certain way, they’re pretending not to feel the way they are. Renee asks, "Which is?" Ally replies, "Meant for each other." Renee asks if Ally thinks that Billy wants to get back together, and Ally says she’s afraid to think about it. Renee says we shouldn’t put restrictions on love, and if Billy’s the guy, Billy’s the guy. Ally says she couldn’t do it to Georgia, and Renee says she’d be doing Georgia a favor - if they had kids it would be different, but they don’t.

Ally is walking while hearing her theme song, but it keeps slowing down, which makes Ally slow down, too. She gets to the office and Ling is wearing Elaine’s face bra while Elaine is telling her
"Laugh. Your face won’t even move." Ling says, "I don’t laugh on weekdays." Ally asks what’s happening, and Elaine says that Ling will produce her infomercial. Ally walks into her office and finds Billy there. He apologized to her for dropping his statement on her, and Ally tells him that kind of thing happens when he sees her happy with other guys, and it passes. Billy says that when he heard that when Richard had hired Ling he planned to leave the firm, but couldn’t handle the thought of not seeing Ally every day. He thought of getting therapy, but he didn’t want to cure himself of the best thing he’d ever known. Ally tells Billy that he’s married, and that even if he weren’t she's with someone else now. Billy says he’s just trying to explain how he could say what he did to her, and do what he’s done to Georgia by saying it. Ally says "Georgia" is a good word for them to say over and over.

During his closing, John says the Love Contract is ridiculous. He and Nelle dated for awhile, and while it’s awkward that it didn’t work out, he would have missed out on so much if he hadn’t dated her. He tells them that to ban flirting and smiling is silly. The lawyer for the corporation says that we have to stop for stop signs even if nobody else is around, and that’s silly; the company was protecting themselves with their rule. John interrupts and says that he forgot to say that people shouldn’t have to follow capricious rules. The opposing lawyer says that if a person doesn’t like the rule, to not work there or change it. The jury finds for Mr. Close and Ms. Horn, and orders the defendants to pay $942,00 in damages.

Ally is working late, and is talking to Greg on the phone. As she hangs up, she sees Billy. She asks him if he worked late with the thought that she might work late, too. He says he doesn’t think so, but on the other hand, he’s there. Billy says that he never imagined he could meet the person of your dreams at age eight, then he closes the door and kisses Ally. They proceed to dance and kiss all over her office as "You Belong to Me" plays.



It is so funny we laugh hysterically, yet other parts can make you cry.
Special thanks to allyfan98
Photographs courtesy of Fox Network

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