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One Life to LoveTell a Friend

 

November13-17 2000


What an exciting week! Thank heavens for SoapNet! It allowed me to catch what I missed due to special news reports and network break-ins.

Although Jess isn’t ready to marry Will, she’s definitely ready for a roommate situation. Coincidentally, Will has just rented a hip loft (guess the landlord doesn’t mind the fact that neither tenant has a job!). Will was thrilled at the prospective of waking up next to Jessica each morning.

But if Jess and Will are riding high, Cris is feeling mighty low. Between losing Jess and injuring his hand, self-pity is Cristian’s mood de jour, and R.J. is just waiting to take advantage. Resentful of R.J.’s interest, Cris accused him of tampering with Todd’s car and causing the accident. When Antonio made the same accusation, R.J. mocked the detection abilities of the LPD’s "goof troop," and labeled Antonio an "ex-punk poseur hiding behind a badge." Hee hee! When Cris offered to help Antonio nail R.J., Antonio told his brother to leave R.J. to the cops, then lectured Cris for wallowing in self-pity over losing Jess. Something tells me Cris won’t take "no" for an answer.

Worried about Roseanne (he hadn’t heard from her in several days), Antonio couldn’t enjoy himself with Sophia at Viki’s wedding. So he went to the station to put out an APB and discovered a cryptic note. Worried at first, Antonio soon deduced a playful come on. Dropping Sophia like a hot rock, he dashed off to a romantic rendezvous with red-hot Rosie.

Antonio found Roseanne in an ultra deluxe hotel in Philadelphia. Roseanne said it was the perfect setting to say "goodbye" and informed her lover it was high time she got on with her life. She boasted about making her mark in Philadelphia high society (say what?!), then played her trump card: "What’s keeping me in Llanview?" I don’t blame Roseanne for pulling this stunt. Antonio treats her like an afterthought, so why shouldn’t she push for more? A flustered Antonio told Roseanne she was important to him and asked her to stay in Llanview. Roseanne capitulated ASAP, and the two tumbled into bed.

Back at the reception, John whispered to Rae that he’d gotten them a room for the night. Naturally, this sent the world’s oldest pseudo-virgin into a panic, and she bored poor Nora with her ridiculous dilemma: "Gee, should I have sex with someone I really like and am really attracted to?" Pathetic.

When Kelly saw Joey leave the reception, she followed him into the Palace bar. Joey admitted he still loved Kelly (no kidding) and can’t get over losing her. He also told Kelly his feelings were his problem and said he’d deal with them. Memo to Kelly: Leave Joey alone.

A freaked-out Blair wound up at the Bayberry Inn, where a triumphant Skye taunted her about losing Max. But when Blair picked up a pair of shiny scissors, Skye got nervous. And when Blair started slicing up Skye’s designer duds, Skye got scared. When Skye tried to save her wardrobe, Blair slashed her hand without batting an eye. That’s when Todd arrived. With surprising gentleness, he managed to get the scissors away from Blair and took her back to his penthouse.

When Max finally realized Asa had done something drastic about Ben, he begged his "Paw" to reveal his plans, but Asa wouldn’t budge beyond telling Max, "Ben Davidson will never hurt you again." Max tried to reason with his "father," and eventually, Asa admitted there was a hit out on Ben. Max almost confessed the truth about Ben’s true relationship to Asa, but ultimately held back. Asa tried to call off the hit, but couldn’t reach either Gray or Roark.

When Skye tried to enlist Max and Asa’s sympathy after Blair’s attack, she didn’t get too far. Max was too worried about Asa’s hit man to care about Skye’s cut hand and gave her the brush off. Once more, an angry Skye vowed revenge.

Tired of waiting at home and worried about Renee, Asa headed to the Palace to check out the situation himself. Due to an injury, Phil Carey wasn’t able to play these scenes and another actor stepped in for a few days. Nothing against the replacement, but not having Phil Carey play these crucial scenes severely diminished their impact.

Back at his penthouse, Todd tried to calm Blair down, but she kept mumbling about the Cramer curse and how Starr was doomed. When Todd took a phone call (from Starr who wanted his credit card number – LOL!), Blair snuck out. Todd caught up with her at St. James – now deserted following the wedding. Blair seemed to think the church was decorated for her and Max to renew their vows, and when Max arrived (looking for the hit man), Blair ran into his arms. Max shoved her away and Blair begged him to stay. Todd ordered Blair never to grovel like that again.

Then Todd took Blair to Dorian’s and once again tried to snap her out of it. When Blair babbled on about losing her mind and losing Max, Todd told her firmly: "You are not going to the Cramer Family looney bin – not on my watch!" He gave Blair a sedative and put her to bed, then left to check on Viki. Alone, Blair saw Addie in a vision. (I love Addie!) Addie told her daughter that when she gets hurt, she hurts back. She also told Blair, "You’re as sane as I am." That didn’t exactly reassure Blair, and she took off.

It seemed to take Mr. Gray the hit man an awfully long time to take his shot (amateur!), but when he did, Ben hit the ground. The use of slow motion in scenes like this has become a cliché, but with the camera alternately framing the action from above and swirling around the wedding guests, the ironic use of music, and then the silence broken by Viki’s shattered cry followed by the horrified expressions of the onlookers – these moments were dramatic, fresh, and terrifically effective.

When Ben fell to the ground, Melanie rushed over to check his condition. And as a child of two could’ve predicted, Renee’s lucky silver dollar warded off the bullet. Oh please! Is that silver dollar made of titanium? The hit man was using a high-powered rifle – would a measly silver dollar stop ammo like that?

When Ben recovered his breath, his first impulse was to dash off to confront Roark. When Viki begged him to stay, he gave her one of those "a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do" speeches. Later, a grim-faced Viki refused to cover for Ben when the cops asked where he’d gone.

After Ben managed to dodge the bullet, Max confronted Asa about what he’d done – the potential damage to Renee, Viki, and Jessica. Finally, he seemed to get through, and Asa promised to end the feud. Just to make sure, Max went to see Roark, gave him a bonus, and told him the job was over. Too bad Roark may have his own plans for Ben this time around.

Asa found Renee and told her his feud with Ben’s family is over. All he wants is for Renee to come back to him. Will she? Asa promised Renee things would be different and assured her he’s a changed man. When Renee asked if Asa had anything to do with Ben getting shot, Asa dodged the question, saying only that he no longer wants Ben dead. Not exactly a forthright denial. Renee wanted to believe Asa, but told him she needs time. She also reminded him that actions speak louder than words.

Antonio and Roseanne’s post-coital afterglow was interrupted when Sophia called Antonio about the shooting and he raced back to Llanview. After Antonio split, Roseanne learned her credit card had been denied at the front desk. Uh oh. Over at the Palace, Antonio and Sophia were assigned security detail outside Viki and Ben’s suite. Instead of paying attention to her duties, Sophia indulged in a romantic daydream involving her and Antonio in a Bondian-type scenario. When Roseanne returned to the Palace, she told Sophia to deal with the fact that she and Antonio are together. Sophia told her rival to stay out of Sophia’s relationship with Antonio. Roseanne may be feeling secure about Antonio, but something is amiss financially. First her credit card was rejected in Philadelphia, now her Palace bill is past due. What’s up? I suspect R.J. had a hand in this.

While half of Llanview sipped champagne at Ben and Viki’s wedding reception, Lindsay was feeling sorry for herself over at the Diner, merrily defacing new "friend" Nora’s photo in the Sun. When she ran into R.J., Lindsay "suggested" he lean on Colin to keep him away from Lindsay. R.J. told Lindsay he was neither her errand boy nor her enforcer. Then he warned Lindsay to stay away from Nora. That’s when it dawned on Lindsay Nora was setting her up – DUH? Lindsay predicted that Nora and Melanie would "cancel each other out," leaving Lindsay a clear path to Bo. Yeah, that’s gonna happen. When Lindsay heard about the shooting, she rushed over to the Palace -- supposedly to check on Will but really to check on Bo.

Once assured of Bo and Will’s safety, Lindsay hung around picking up useful pieces of information. After learning the shooter was spotted at the mob bar, Lindsay put two and two together and made a beeline for Asa with an offer: She’ll keep quiet about that envelope he gave Roark if he makes it worth her while. Now why would Asa pay? After all, Kevin and Kelly saw him with Roark too – so it’s hardly a secret.

Meanwhile, Ben arrived at Roark’s bar/hangout and began tossing around accusations. Soon Joey and Kevin arrived to provide backup. Roark played it cool and made Ben look like a fool. Plus the hit man was sitting right there, and Ben didn’t even realize it! Can someone explain the purpose behind Ben’s visit? To me, it seemed like a pointless exercise in reckless machismo.

Back at the Palace, Viki was beside herself with worry while her attendants (sans Nora) buzzed around her, which despite their best intentions, made a bad situation worse. When Ben returned safe and sound, he told Viki he needed to return to the mob world in order to put a stop to this situation once and for all. Astonishingly, Viki accepted his reasoning. I guess she really meant that "for better or worse" stuff.

Given Max’s suspicious behavior and Joey and Kevin’s information about Asa ratting them out to the mob, Bo asked Nora if she thought Asa could have arranged the hit. When Asa showed up, Bo asked him the same thing, but Asa denied any involvement.

After Kelly identified the shooter from a book of police photographs, Joey and Kevin realized it was the same guy they just saw at the bar – DUH! Of course, by the time the LPD showed up, Mr. Gray was gone. Now if Ben hadn’t already alerted those guys, the LPD might have actually made a timely arrest!

Max returned home from buying off the mob and was pouring himself a well-deserved drink, when he was struck down by a bullet in the back – fired by Blair! Wow! We all knew Ben would be shot (and saved by Renee’s silver dollar), but I never saw this coming.

Seeing her husband on the ground oozing life, shocked Blair out of her delusional state – and straight into hysterics. When she recovered enough to dial 911, Todd stopped her. Todd coolly suggested letting Max die, but that only revved up Blair’s anguish. But when Todd pointed out that calling 911 would almost certainly lead to her arrest and subsequent imprisonment, Blair agreed to let Todd take care of things: "Help me -- you can have whatever you want, just help me." Gee, Blair, don’t you remember what happened the last time you trusted Todd to take care of things!

Later, Skye ran into Rae outside of Buke Manor, and the two ladies faced off yet again. Skye called Rae "a lonely dried-up hack" (ouch!) and vowed revenge on the people who crossed her like Max and Rae. A few scenes later, Sophia just happened to notice the blood on Skye’s sweater (from the cut on her hand). Well, now we know who’s gonna take the fall for shooting Max. That’s an even better revenge for Blair and she didn’t even plan it!

SNIPPETS

· Is this all Andrew came back to do? No one portrays a man of the cloth with more dignity and soulfulness than Wortham Krimmer, but how about a pre-wedding chat between Viki and Andrew (after all, Viki’s last marriage was to Andrew’s father)? Why not have Andrew discussing Cassie with Kelly or having a heart-to-heart with Joey – after all, they both lost their wives to Kevin! Or how about having Andrew confront Kevin about being a serial homewrecker!

· When Nora told Rae best friends make the best lovers was she talking about Sam or Bo?

· James DePaiva did a super job this week as Max struggled to keep Asa from crossing the point of no return.

· Hey, maybe Nora and Joey can console each other?

· When Blair picked up those scissors at Skye’s, did anyone else flash back to that great scene between Marty and Blair from a couple years ago?

· I realize Viki and Todd have had their problems lately, but it was still extremely callous of Kevin to brush off Todd’s concern for Viki’s safety after the assassin attempt on Ben.

· More stellar work by the LPD – both the hit man and Ben slipped away from the crime scene with ease.

· With her hair up and wearing a stunning halter gown, Lainie looked super at the wedding. Sophia also looked fantastic in a deceptively simple red sheath. But I have to label Viki’s wedding gown a misfire -- too fairytale, too costumey, too much! She looked like a refuge from the Renaissance Faire with her high collar giving her a touch of Elvis. Something simpler and more sophisticated would’ve been much more flattering (not to mention more appropriate).

· How perfect that Melanie wore green to Viki’s wedding. Every time Bo exchanged a few words with Nora, Lainie was darting jealous glances their way. Guess she’s Lindsay’s sister after all.

· Did anyone else crack up when Bo said to John, "What’s the word on the street?"?

· When Kelly described the hit man as being in his fifties, I had to laugh. Even with his fake gray hair and beard, that actor is barely thirty if he’s a day.

· Nice to see the writers remember Jessica’s writing ambitions.

· Sometimes that little wink Viki gives seems inappropriate to what’s happening on screen.

· As much as I love Kassie DePaiva’s work, I’m not sold on her portrayal of an over-the-edge Blair.

· I enjoyed Erin Torphy’s singing at Viki’s wedding but wish they’d adjusted the sound so it didn’t sound so obviously pre-recorded.

· How appropriate that the hit man would have a "killer" headache.

· It was great to see Nora dancing with Hank. I still think OLTL should’ve keep Nora’s memory at the Hank stage for a wee bit longer.

· Sam’s speech at the reception was very touching.

· I love Blair and Nora’s sexy new photos in the opening montage – you go, girls!

· With her ruffled shirt and crushed velvet jacket, Blair looks like Austin Powers!

· Antonio is too much. He leaves Roseanne’s bed and then two seconds later starts flirting with Sophia. Down, boy!

· Antonio blames R.J. for Cris’s injury -- what about the fact that Cris stole a car?

· First Asa, then Blair -- apparently there’s nothing like shooting someone or arranging for them to be shot to snap a person out of their mental confusion. That’s some pretty drastic therapy!

Till next week!

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