One Life to Love
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January 10-14 2000

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The big story last week was "Will Takes a Fall" -- and I'm loving every minute! Not that I want Will carted off to Statesville (a la Asa's fantasy), but because lil' Willie Boy's long overdue for a reality check. He thinks he's got everything sussed out and he thinks he can handle Asa Buchanan -- HA! Plus Will's downfall is gonna shake things up big-time all across the canvas:
Will's arrest will be the ultimate test of Jessica's feelings. Will she stand by her man or turn to Cristian for comfort?

When Cris hears the news, will he dash back to Llanview to support Jessica? More importantly, if Will admits to being in cahoots with Roseanne, how will Cris react?

Ben can barely keep his temper in check as is, but with Asa's latest salvo, will he finally make good on his payback threats?

So much for Sam and Nora's plans for a Tahitian combo wedding/honeymoon.

What's the impact on Lindsay and Bo's engagement? Can Lindsay handle Bo doing his job? Will she hold him responsible for Asa's actions?

Stay tuned!

Hereís what went down: After finding Jessica and Will in a major clinch, Asa was fit to be tied, so he ordered a surprise audit of the Megan Foundation, which turned up $500,000 missing and a paper trial leading straight to Will Rappaport. (Please note that Midge predicted this months ago.)

Okay, here's where I'm confused. I know Will took $30,000 from the foundation. And then Asa sent an additional $100,000 to Roseanne, so how does that add up to $500,000? I'm assuming the answer is Asa. And I do recall a phone call where Asa asked someone to set up an amateurish offshore account, so I guess thatís where the rest of the money went.

I am relishing every moment as Asa tightens the noose around Slick Willie's neck. Asa took the information to Bo and told him that he hoped his accountants are wrong. Asa really laid it on thick in these scenes, acting as if the news of Will's perfidy was a total shock and disappointment. Phil Carey was masterful in -- oozing (faux) concern and dripping with (in)sincerity. When Asa presented Bo with the evidence, Bo tried to reserve judgment based on his belief in Will's character, but as usual, Hang 'em Hank Gannon was ready to slap on the cuffs.

Boy, that Will is a total chump. He bought Asa's act -- hook, line, and sinker, and now he's paying for it. The thing is, Will *is* guilty. Not $500,000 worth, but $30,000 at least, so it's hard to feel too sorry for him. It was really funny to see Will bragging to Jessica just before Bo arrived to arrest him, telling her that "Asa's counting on me." More than you know, kid.

The other big news is that Engagement Fever is sweeping Llanview. Funny thing, though, no one (except for a couple of the engagees) seems too terribly happy when they hear the news.

As he said, he may live to regret this, but Sam put his foot down over Nora's frantic rush to the altar. He wanted to know what she was so afraid of? And why couldnít they take the time to make it a celebration with all the trimmings -- a special day surrounded by friends and family? Nora agreed, but she's still feeling unsettled.

Later in the week, all decked out in Island Girl drag (flowers, grass skirt, bikini top), Nora convinced Sam to run away to Tahiti with her to get married. Unfortunately, that's when Lindsay barged in with the news of Will's arrest.

The news of Lindsay and Bo's engagement was greeted with underwhelming enthusiasm. When Bo told Asa that he and Lindsay were getting married, Asa played it cool, but Bo wasn't buying it and warned Asa not to interfere. When Bo broke the news to Sam and Nora, Nora's face froze into a fake smile. Sam watched her response very closely. Bo
told Nora "if it wasn't for you, I probably wouldn't have asked Lindsay to marry me;" Nora looked nauseated.

Poor Renee had to work overtime to put on even the semblance of a gracious front in front of her daughter-in-law-to-be (again). When Lindsay tried to share her happiness with Viki and Ben, she got a very starchy response.

Actually, Lindsay's engagement enthusiasm was rather endearing. That is, until she started flashing her rock in Nora's face. Look out! Usually, Nora tries to take the high road with Lindsay, at least initially, but this time the gloves were off immediately and it wasn't long before Nora told Lindsay to "take a flying leap." Gee, I wonder why Nora is so upset... Then as Dorian and Lindsay were making a toast to "Getting away with it," up walks Nora. Remember, Nora has never forgotten about the big secret that Lindsay refused to divulge during her trial.

If Bo's proposal to Lindsay came out of left field, how about Cris's proposal to Roseanne! Come on! What are they thinking of? They both know Cris is still hung up on Jessica, not to mention the fact that they're way too young. Roseanne seems like a total doormat and Cris comes off as an idiot.

When Cris told Carlotta that he'd asked Roseanne to marry him, Carlotta turned ashen. Then she tried to talk some sense into her stubborn son to no avail. Naturally, Roseanne couldn't resist rubbing Jessica's nose in the news of her engagement, but Jess gave as good as she got, telling Roseanne she was pathetic and an obvious "second choice."

On the non-engagement front, Ben found out that Asa had rigged the medical board against him, so he threw in the towel and tore up his medical license in front of Asa. Yeah, that's showing him -- NOT! I think Ben is a jerk. He doesn't want Viki or Sam to help him fight Asa, he'd rather storm around breaking furniture. I think Viki should reconsider
marriage to this volatile loser.

So what did Ben do next? He retrieved his gun from its hiding place at Crossroads -- yeah, that's a real smart move!

R.J. hit the roof when he found out that Hank was having him shadowed by an undercover cop. I don't get it. Why did R.J. react so violently to the idea of police protection? Does he know who's after him? Does it have to do with Judge Peterson? I think it's funny when R.J. accuses Hank of always assuming that R.J. is guilty -- Hank always assumes
that everyone is guilty! Don't take it personally, brother.

Kevin and Kelly (a.k.a. the guilty gropers) did their best to make a bad situation worse. First of all, Kelly and Kevin were acting so weird toward each other that even the normally obtuse Joey started asking questions. Then Kelly told Joey that they should move out, but Joey insisted on staying because they're making such "progress" with Kevin. I love how Joey is being so nice and understanding about Kevin -- it really heaps on the guilt!!

Kevin and Kelly are even worse conspirators than Max and Blair. Instead of trying to forget about their little New Year's Eve "episode," they decide it's smarter to meet secretly and hash out all the details so they can lie to Joey more convincingly. Naturally, Joey almost immediately catches Kevin in a lie. Kevin was on the phone to Kelly and when
Joey walked in he said he was talking to Jessica. So Joey picked up the other extension and Kelly hung up. Gee, that doesn't seem suspicious.

Kevin is being a disgusting horndog. He supposedly feels guilty for making out with Kelly but can't seem to keep his greasy mitts off her, stroking her hair and helping her adjust her coat in a totally proprietary manner. And Kelly didn't seem to mind. These two are making me sick!

Snippets:

  • I actually liked Ben this week when he lit into Will for his naive attitude toward Asa. Then Sam and Will got into it again, pretty heatedly. It's gonna be great watching Will eat crow when Asa cuts his heart out.

  • So Jessica snowboards? -- Cool! Freestyle or freeride?

  • I had to adjust my set to make sure I was really seeing Viki paying attention to her daughter and actually listening to her current romantic dilemma (Will vs. Cris) -- for about two seconds till her overweening obsession with Ben again took center stage.

  • It really cracks me up when everyone raves about what a great artist Cris is and all we see are these corny attempts at portraiture right out of high school art class.

  • Gee, Ben, Blair's not exactly the "support group" type!

  • Well, the Internet is a abuzz about Viki's pending medical crisis. I think it could be a great story for Viki and great material for ES who (IMO) has been wasted in this unconvincing romance with Ben.

  • Carlotta reacts to Roseanne as if the girl smelled bad.

  • Ben and Viki's puerile talk about fairy tale worlds and demons and dragons is truly embarrassing. Starr and River display more maturity!

  • So are Cris and Roseanne getting married in a week or something? What's the rush? Oh, yeah, we need a motivation for Antonio's return. (Welcome back, Kamar!)

  • I hope Crossroads has some kind of bed or cot in the backroom -- otherwise, grand passion or no grand passion, that would be one uncomfortable night!

  • Renee nailed Asa but good on his concern over Jessica's virtue, "If she were a boy, you'd be a struttin' proud papa."

  • Wow, Nora is in super shape! She looked fit and fabulous in her grass skirt and bikini top.

  • Jess emailed her congrats to Cris. Since when does he have a computer? And even if he does (at school), how did Jess get his email address?

  • According to a recent poll in Soap Opera Weekly, most people think John Sykes is the missing Buchanan heir. Why? That would be totally boring.

  • Loved Lindsay's bright pink scarf. She usually sticks to basic black or white, so itís refreshing to see her wearing some color.

  • Kudos to the prop dept. Not only was that "old" news clipping realistically yellowed, it actually had old photos of HBS and Kale Brown with their "hideous hair" (Nora's words).

  • More inching toward the mainstream in Sophia's hairstyles and fashions. I hope they donít go too far and bland her out completely!

  • Way to go Larry! Not only did Larry display a lot of personal integrity in going against Asa's plan to railroad Ben, but he also had a pretty foxy (and pretty young) lunch date at the Palace!

  • Do doctor's typically carry their medical licenses in their wallets?

  • No more hats for Max -- and just when I was enjoying the anticipation of what was next? Bowler? Kaiser helmet? Stovepipe?

  • When Carlotta told Cris, "You can't change what's in your heart." I yelled, Right on!

  • Tee hee as a relentlessly cheerful Lindsay showed up at Nora and Sam's with a housewarming plant and heartfelt invitation to her and Bo's wedding. Nora glowered.


Till next week!

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